Thoughts on Red

    -Oh. My. God. Old people being awesome and young people trying to get their heads out of their asses, and failing miserably. Red, where have you been all my life?

    -Not just any old people, either. The best old people. Ernest Borgnine, for two deliriously awesome scenes. Helen Mirren, classing up the joint. Morgan Freeman, putting on a bad French accent for a bit, but who cares, he's Morgan Freeman. John Malkovich, who's always best when he's being weird. Bruce Willis, I mean, meh, but I can deal with it. Richard Dreyfuss, not playing the vice president for some reason.

    -And, yeah, Mary-Louise Parker, being all quirky and oh-me-lawd-I-can't-find-a-man-even-though-I'm-all-Mary-Louise-Parker-y. And Karl Urban. But, since I hate his face and his I'm-serious-because-my-eyebrows-are-scrunched-and-my-voice-is-gravelly-look bullshit, we'll forget he's there.

    -This isn't aiming for the Oscars, as cliche as that is. It aspires to be nothing but a call to arms. This is no time to fuck around, senior citizens of the world. Get off your asses and start shooting people, because dammit, we young people got no manners and we use curse words!

    -Lovely popcorn flick. in fact, I actually bought popcorn. Lucky!

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Thoughts on Red


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